this is how you see me dying on stage
look at these men go hand in hand and back to back
like a russian roulette game with a dagger in their hands
then they face each other for the big bang
"what terrible acting
what terrible acting this is!"
all real actors give their souls away
if you want the part you must die for it, earn it with your pride
let it be known, all men who bow to the audience must bow to their maker
i am trapped in this writing script choking on these words
the only theif to ever earned a living has died trying
so give yourself! give me redemption! let me see your eyes!
allow me to watch you die!
give me sadness! give me sorrow! give me anger!
now cringe and let the tears fall. yes! now this is good acting
alright now continue on... where the two men fall with daggers in their hands
they are not ever coming back
all chambers are locked
the doors are shut
the wind has stopped
the audience listens as the dead men drop.
good! now we're all not coming back ever again.
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
Monday, December 7, 2009
rotting from the outside in. The Last Hope. (Goodbye)
what a new world this is
quiet and cold
i dont feel what i have become
not enough energy in me to stay alive
mentally struggling, my heart screams apathy
no one out there to relate to me
so quiet i feel my nerves struggle for a sense of some anarchy
what wings i have on my back
a faith behind my every step
no thought of humanity
where have all the people gone?
all of the good souls?
wished i didnt feel so alone
on this battle ground i am the last fight
rescue me as im reaching out for you
deny me and ill leave quietly with the songs you left for me
im feeling sick as my immune system weakness
at my collapse
oh what a terrible collapse this is
my legs give out from underneath me
the struggling gets worse as im holding onto my own reflection
remembering who i was
and all i remember is pain
i love the love, i lost the will to fight
my mind goes off wondering and im left with this body that was created for me
i live in this room and i feel myself going insane
is this the insanity in which everyone drowns in?
my sorrows take over my eyes
i feel myself letting go
O' God is there still time? save me.
my legs give out, my arms give out, my body gives out
save me.
now it soaks in me and it is here
what has become of this.
and now the depression begins.
i lost the will to fight, nothing exists to me, not even myself.
quiet and cold
i dont feel what i have become
not enough energy in me to stay alive
mentally struggling, my heart screams apathy
no one out there to relate to me
so quiet i feel my nerves struggle for a sense of some anarchy
what wings i have on my back
a faith behind my every step
no thought of humanity
where have all the people gone?
all of the good souls?
wished i didnt feel so alone
on this battle ground i am the last fight
rescue me as im reaching out for you
deny me and ill leave quietly with the songs you left for me
im feeling sick as my immune system weakness
at my collapse
oh what a terrible collapse this is
my legs give out from underneath me
the struggling gets worse as im holding onto my own reflection
remembering who i was
and all i remember is pain
i love the love, i lost the will to fight
my mind goes off wondering and im left with this body that was created for me
i live in this room and i feel myself going insane
is this the insanity in which everyone drowns in?
my sorrows take over my eyes
i feel myself letting go
O' God is there still time? save me.
my legs give out, my arms give out, my body gives out
save me.
now it soaks in me and it is here
what has become of this.
and now the depression begins.
i lost the will to fight, nothing exists to me, not even myself.
Friday, December 4, 2009
YOU. is all i know.
ive seen faces change as seasons age
wishing for the world to be more colorful then black and grey
get beyond the spectrum as my name seems to always appear in your mind
let it echo through time
what i want, i know i cant wished for
so allow me to make the example of the living ghost.
oh...my...God
where have you gone?
though ive heard you in my songs
i know what i have to do
but i need your strength too
will you remember my name
although im not looking for fame
i just need mankind to see that i am not insane.
jesus...remember...me
i have a vision of a wife
to help produce life
in the river of many daughters who could run with their fathers
and swim through the trees as it becomes easier to breathe
i can hear laughter as im spinning faster in the air of dis pare
please remember my name as i tell you its not for fame
i just want to see people fall in love and fly with all the doves
i give you my heart for its just a little start
God...forgive...me
as i confess all my sins to you
love has found me again
i am set free as she comforts me
she is the key to this world
with her i can be welcomed into the kingdom of heaven
i am not a saint, and i am not a good person
i admit everything to you but i know and i believe
that its not too late, to get me out of this prison.
i...love...you
God has given me another chance, he sent me an angel
and ive fallen in love with you
i believe we were meant to be
just as we are both here to be sent free
i will forever put my life in front of yours to protect you
you are my angel sent from God
and ill try to be an angel for you
to be worthy enough for you
i want God to see me
i want jesus to remember me
and i want you to love me
forever. and ever.
our love is sent free.
believe in me. as i believe in you.
as i pray for you.
YOU. is all i know.
wishing for the world to be more colorful then black and grey
get beyond the spectrum as my name seems to always appear in your mind
let it echo through time
what i want, i know i cant wished for
so allow me to make the example of the living ghost.
oh...my...God
where have you gone?
though ive heard you in my songs
i know what i have to do
but i need your strength too
will you remember my name
although im not looking for fame
i just need mankind to see that i am not insane.
jesus...remember...me
i have a vision of a wife
to help produce life
in the river of many daughters who could run with their fathers
and swim through the trees as it becomes easier to breathe
i can hear laughter as im spinning faster in the air of dis pare
please remember my name as i tell you its not for fame
i just want to see people fall in love and fly with all the doves
i give you my heart for its just a little start
God...forgive...me
as i confess all my sins to you
love has found me again
i am set free as she comforts me
she is the key to this world
with her i can be welcomed into the kingdom of heaven
i am not a saint, and i am not a good person
i admit everything to you but i know and i believe
that its not too late, to get me out of this prison.
i...love...you
God has given me another chance, he sent me an angel
and ive fallen in love with you
i believe we were meant to be
just as we are both here to be sent free
i will forever put my life in front of yours to protect you
you are my angel sent from God
and ill try to be an angel for you
to be worthy enough for you
i want God to see me
i want jesus to remember me
and i want you to love me
forever. and ever.
our love is sent free.
believe in me. as i believe in you.
as i pray for you.
YOU. is all i know.
forest fire
the stars become my eyes as i travel through the light
the sky becomes my body as i feel the warmth swallow me
its a narrow path through life but im not done yet
hear my voice and read my words
your weapons are useless here
ive been waiting for you longer then you've been waiting for me
something strikes me so sharply, like a knife through the heart
i lay here now in silence...
but where there is darkness there is light
i dont care anymore, because there is something more than this world
i have no idols, no heroes, i look up to no one other then myself
he is the only judgement i will ever face
so i leave you to yourself...
do you believe the only cage you ever lived in was your body?
we've killed them all but we cannot wash their bodies away
their blood soaks the earth, and their bones become branches
as far as im aware the innocent have to pay for everything.
the sky becomes my body as i feel the warmth swallow me
its a narrow path through life but im not done yet
hear my voice and read my words
your weapons are useless here
ive been waiting for you longer then you've been waiting for me
something strikes me so sharply, like a knife through the heart
i lay here now in silence...
but where there is darkness there is light
i dont care anymore, because there is something more than this world
i have no idols, no heroes, i look up to no one other then myself
he is the only judgement i will ever face
so i leave you to yourself...
do you believe the only cage you ever lived in was your body?
we've killed them all but we cannot wash their bodies away
their blood soaks the earth, and their bones become branches
as far as im aware the innocent have to pay for everything.
Thursday, December 3, 2009
Lord of Xibalba
WELCOME TO THE TREE OF LIFE!
do you dare to wonder what possibilities are for you out there?
do you believe that there is a life beyond a life?
behold all grace has come from this tree, in it is sap with eternal life. drink it and become immortal.
for the world wont end, and neither will you. but beware of the opportunities that are out there for you. beware of everything that you are giving up.
its a message sent directly to the lord.
your telling him that you are never coming home. understand that if you wish to never come home, then thats okay too. but clock in because on earth you have a Job to do. do it proudly. for the tree of life is in your hands.
"The LORD God made garments of skin for Adam and his wife and clothed them. And the LORD God said, "The man has now become like one of us, knowing good and evil. He must not be allowed to reach out his hand and take also from the tree of life and eat, and live forever." So the LORD God banished him from the Garden of Eden to work the ground from which he had been taken. After he drove the man out, he placed on the east side of the Garden of Eden cherubim and a flaming sword flashing back and forth to guard the way to the tree of life."
do you dare to wonder what possibilities are for you out there?
do you believe that there is a life beyond a life?
behold all grace has come from this tree, in it is sap with eternal life. drink it and become immortal.
for the world wont end, and neither will you. but beware of the opportunities that are out there for you. beware of everything that you are giving up.
its a message sent directly to the lord.
your telling him that you are never coming home. understand that if you wish to never come home, then thats okay too. but clock in because on earth you have a Job to do. do it proudly. for the tree of life is in your hands.
"The LORD God made garments of skin for Adam and his wife and clothed them. And the LORD God said, "The man has now become like one of us, knowing good and evil. He must not be allowed to reach out his hand and take also from the tree of life and eat, and live forever." So the LORD God banished him from the Garden of Eden to work the ground from which he had been taken. After he drove the man out, he placed on the east side of the Garden of Eden cherubim and a flaming sword flashing back and forth to guard the way to the tree of life."
animals biggest mankind
all i see on me is skin to hold my muscles and bones into place.
without this i could not exist, even my soul needs a place to live.
beware of the sleepless ghost that lives in dead bodies.
as they rot the earth, their blood waters the roots of their bones back to life.
then when the sun shines its rays to create life, out comes a tree of death.
blood death. just as love is created, evil is created. blinded by light and invisible to darkness.
this world comes with handshakes, but never hugs.
"The fear and dread of you will fall upon all the beasts of the earth and all the birds of the air, upon every creature that moves along the ground, and upon all the fish of the sea; they are given into your hands."
without this i could not exist, even my soul needs a place to live.
beware of the sleepless ghost that lives in dead bodies.
as they rot the earth, their blood waters the roots of their bones back to life.
then when the sun shines its rays to create life, out comes a tree of death.
blood death. just as love is created, evil is created. blinded by light and invisible to darkness.
this world comes with handshakes, but never hugs.
"The fear and dread of you will fall upon all the beasts of the earth and all the birds of the air, upon every creature that moves along the ground, and upon all the fish of the sea; they are given into your hands."
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
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